One step closer
by Starlight Soul
Summary: returning to a world that you've wronged without knowledge of how you've wronged it is hard. Can one warrior survive without? Rated for cutting.
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I don't own the Ronins, Warlords, or Kayura. The song belongs to Linkin Park. I don't claim to own anything but the time put into writing this. Please don't sue me I'm a poor college student.

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One Step Closer

Kayura stood watching out the castle window. She could see the former warlords out among the people giving them food and offering help. She was careful to stay back in the shadows of the room where the people couldn't see her. She was just beginning to remember all of the horrible things she did for Talpa but the people knew. They remembered the Devil Woman who killed their husbands, stole their children, and burned their homes. They had been willing to accept the other warlords back slowly but not her. it was that first traumatic day, after Talpa's defeat, that kept her locked within the walls of the castle. The dark haired yound woman turned away from the open window and tried to shut out the silent screams caller Demon priestess, Murderer, and hardest to bear Baby killer. She quickly regained her composure as she heard the door open behind her.

" Lady Kayura, you should not lock yourself away. The people will forgive you but they need time and they must know the truth."

" It seems they already know the truth Mage." hissed Kayura to the white haired warrior," I burned their villages, Killed their families, Murdered their children. What makes you think that they will ever be able to forgive me?"

" But Lady, You were..."

"Leave me Dais!"

" Yes Lady."

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I cannot take this anymore

I'm saying everything I've said before

All these words they make no sense

I find bliss in ignorance

Less I hear the less you'll say

But You'll find that out anyways.

Kayura didn't wait for Dais to leave, she ran from the room, hands covering her ears trying to block out the voices. She pushed her way through the hall past the still healing warrior of cruelty towards her room. Once inside she closed the door and locked it in hopes of locking out the ghosts from her past. In the silence of her room ghosts from her past assaulted her with their cries. The young warrior cover her ears and squeezed her eyes closed but even that couldn't block out the sound or the visions of children locked inside a burning house.

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Just Like Before....

Just like before....

Behind the darkness of her eyelids she could see the faces of the men, women, and children that she hurt. Their eyes begged and they reached out to their loved ones as she dragged them away knowing that when she was finished they would beg to die. She watched Baddamon brainwash the young boys and heard herself laugh as they returned home to kill the ones they loved. To escape the visions of her past she reached under her blanket and removed the Sakura Dagger. Throwing the sheath against the wall she slid the cold metal across the pale flesh of her stomach and watched as purifying redness rolled along her skin while the pain washed away the memories.

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Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breath

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

When Kayura woke up the sky was darkening and night was beginning to fall. Dinner would be soon and she was expected to attend so she sat up slowly. Her stomach ached from her self inflicted wounds but she ignored the pain and got up. At her wash bin she used a soft cloth to wash away the dried blood which clung to her skin like red earth. When she was finished she replaced her Kimono and made her way to the great hall where they would eat.

By the time she arrived, all of the food was on the table and the four warriors waited patiently for her. Since the defeat of Talpa the neather realm flourished with life. there was no shortage of food for anyone. Kayura watched everyone through the meal and picked unenthusiastically at her food. They ate in a tense silence while everyone tried to figure out what to say. Finally Anubis broke the thickening silence.

" Kayura, you should get out of the castle more. The people what to know about you. It would be better for them and for you that way." said Anubis gently.

" How would you know what is good for me?" she spit back at him.

" You've locked yourself away in here for nearly six months Lady," admonished kale, only Anbuis had the guts to use her given name," Not even I can give up the sunlight forever. Like the flowers people need the sun."

" It is my choice, leave me to it." she snapped jumping from her chair.

Anubis let his voice roll like thunder," When the Ronins arrive in the morning I want you to escort them on a tour of the country side."

kayura ran from the room without replying to the warlords command. when she reached the safety of her room she found the Sakura dagger again.

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I find the answers aren't so clean

Wish I could find a way to disappear

All these thought they make no sense

I find bliss in ignorance

Nothing seems to go away

Over and over again...

Her pale pink kimono fell like a pool of Sakura and only her small caged bird was there to bear witness to the new pink scars covering her pale flesh. Kayura tried to sleep, she lay there for hours and every once in a while her fingers reached out to feel the security of the cold metal pain which lay beside her. It was her only escape, the only way to make the voices stop tormenting her. Finally sleep took her but once again she was tormented by images of the three captured warriors who were tormented by her hands. Their screams echoed through her mind like lightning.

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Just Like Before...

Just Like before...

Kayura awoke with a scream on her lips. The voices of the captive warriors haunted her. and she couldn't force their pain filled faces from her mind. For every blow they received her sakura dagger cut deeper and longer gashes. Blood ran in crimson rivers along her white flesh to stain the stone floor with her agony.

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Everything you say to me

Takes me one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

I need a little room to breath

Cause I'm one step closer to the edge

And I'm about to break

Kayura continued to cut her body. As the Voices and images seemed to grow more real and alive. As she neared morning loss of blood, open wounds, and exhaustion started to take their toll on the last of the Ancients but she continued on. Tears streamed down her ghostly pale cheeks, she could hear him in her mind again whispering his poisons. She could hear Talpa's dark calling to her even though she knew that he was destroyed.

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Shut up when I'm talking to you

Shut up, shut up, shut up

Kayura pulled the dagger across her wrists just as she felt the familiar energy of a portal opening to the mortal realm.

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Shut up When I'm talking to you

Shut up, shut up, shut up

I'm about to Break!


	2. Chapter two

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One Step Closer part two

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Crawling in my skin

these wounds they will not heal

Fear is how I fall

Confusing what it real

Anger radiated from Anubis like heat from a wood stove when she didn't appear to greet the Ronins so the entire group marched up to her room. He was prepared to embarrass her but he wasn't prepared for what they found. They found Kayura in her room, lying in a pool of her own blood. Cye had felt it the moment that they stepped out of the gate. The darkness engulfing a mind, filling it with despair until there was nothing else. Sage felt it too. The pulling of a life from a world but no one knew. It was only by shear luck that they found her. Sage did what he could for her but there was a lot of damage and he couldn't heal it all right away. After Sage healed the worst of her wounds fever wracked her frail body.

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There's something inside of me that pulls to the surface

Consuming, Confusing

This lack of self control I fear is never ending

Controlling

Within the depths of her fever dreams demons pulled kayura downwards towards the end that she wanted so much but something held her back. Even as fever burned her body fear and hate burned her mind. She hated herself for every action she made for Talpa and Baddamon. Visions of the people she harmed haunted her fever dreams. She searched and searched for her dagger trying to find the pain to make it end. no matter how hard she searched she couldn't find the end she wanted.

Cye stayed with Kayura night and day till exhaustion claimed him and still he slept by her side. It was from his hand that a soft cloth soothed her throbbing head and he climbed into her ravaged mind to fight the demons she was slowly losing her life to. The closer he seemed to get to Kayura the further away she got. It seemed as though she were running away from him.

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I can't seem

to find myself again

My walls are closing in

(Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced that there's too much pressure to take)

I've felt this way before

So insecure

Kayura could see him, his light blue armor shone through the darkness like a light house guiding her home but fear kept her rooted in place. She had found safety within the darkness and now she was afraid to go to the light. She had know that light once before and it had abandoned her to the pain. He was supposed to protect her and her village but instead she was left with Talpa and Baddamon. 

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Chorus

Discomfort, endlessly has pulled itself upon me

Distracting, reacting

Against my will I stand beside my own reflection

It's haunting how I can't seem...

To find myself again

My walls are closing in

(Without a sense of confidence I'm convinced that there's just too much pressure to take)

I've felt this way before

So insecure

Chorus (Repeat until end)

There's something inside me that pulls beneath the surface

Consuming, confusing

This lack of self control I fear is never ending

Controlling (Whispered during chorus) 


	3. Chapter three

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One Step Closer Three  
Cye knew something was wrong the moment he stepped through the portal. He could feel her anguished mind begging for and end just as Sage could feel her life slowly slipping away, like sand through their fingers. Without warning he grabbed Sage by the arm and ran past Anubis. The startled Warlord and three remaining Ronins quickly followed To find out what was going on.  
  
When Cye and Sage finally reached their destination they found the door locked. The two boys easily ripped the door away just as their forgotten companions arrived. Inside, they found Lady Kayura lying in a pool of blood on her floor. In her hand she held a dagger with a Sakura Petal design on the handle. Angry red gashes covered her. A collective gasp swept through the group as Cye and Sage began to work. Sage worked as fast as he could to stop her bleeding while Cye found himself entering her mind. What he found frightened him.  
  
Inside kayura's mind, Cye found himself in a pale pool where he was assaulted by visions of Kayura's time under Talpa's control. With a stray thought he pushed through the visions towards a disturbance in the surface of the water. With ease, he made his way through the water of kayura's pool. This was his element; he understood the mind because like the water it is consistent in its inconsistencies.  
  
Pushing all other thoughts aside Cye swam on until the water around him seemed to turn red with blood. In the center of the bloodied water he saw her pushing something beneath the surface. Instantly he knew that this wasn't the Kayura he was searching for. This Kayura, though she was covered in blood, didn't have a scratch on her. Seeing a possible answer he dove down just in time to see his Kayura give up. Swimming as hard as he could he struggled to reach her before death could claim its prize but he knew that within her mind he could not do it alone. As he neared her limp body he reached out and hoped without hope that he could give her that last link to life. He stretched and felt his fingers brush against her just as her eyes fell shut.  
  
Cye grasped Kayura's hand and he caught hold in a desperate grip, pulling her closer to him. As soon as he could he pulled her to the surface and the scene changed. The two warriors found themselves in a wildly over grown garden. Flowers of all types and colors. Cye held Kayura's arm, even in her mind she was becoming weak. The garden seemed to be trapped at the midnight hour and Kayura severely weakened.  
  
" I know this place," whispered Kayura fearfully," Why have you brought me here Cye? Baddamon kept me here, Why are we here?"  
  
" We're here in this garden because it represents who you are. You are dying Kayura and Sage and I can't stop it unless you fight to live." Said Cye.  
  
" That is why it is wilting." she commented softly.  
  
" Why Yu-Chan?" Cye held up the Sakura dagger for her to see," Why hurt yourself? You could have come to me."  
  
" What could you have done to erase all of the things that I've done?" she cried turning away," I killed so many people. I dragged them out of their homes, tortured, and killed them. I deserved to die more than anyone else. Can you make their voices stop screaming in my head? Can you banish their faces as they beg for mercy that's too late to help them? Mercy that I couldn't give them. Every time I close my eyes I see you and the others screaming."   
  
Cye placed his hand gently on her shoulder," kayura, I wish you had come to me, I might have be able to help if you let me." He said moving around to embrace her. As she fell into his arms she felt as though warm water washed over her, adding to the increasing light within the garden.  
  
When Cye opened his eyes Kayura was in his arms and the soft green glow, from Sage healing her, was just beginning to fade. Sage slumped down on the floor and let his head rest in his hands. Cye blinked a few times trying to reorient himself with the real world. At the door, Anubis and the other Ronins were joined by the rest of the former warlords.  
  
" She's alive," sighed Sage softly," She's going to be all right."  
  
" She's going to need a lot of support." replied Cye," A whole lot of support."


End file.
